Feeling undone…..

Do you ever get the feeling that you’re getting it all wrong? Today I feel just that. Every decision I’ve made has been the wrong one, all my good intentions have backfired and the deep set wrinkle in my forehead has become a trench. Not good.

We are all human and that is definitely something I have to remind myself, daily. Before I became a mum, I lived quite a selfish existence. I lived in London, worked as an actress and apart from paying the rent, I really didn’t have that many more responsibilities. It was great! Why is it we struggle to appreciate where we are, what we have, in the present moment? I’ve learned to do that more. It’s healthier to try and keep the past, well, in the past. But today, well it all went so wrong. Arguments, feeling out of control, not being able to fix it, crying, shouting, you name it. I’m a Mum and I get it wrong sometimes. But that’s the thing, being a Mum has definitely meant relinquishing that selfish actress and it’s been hard. That’s not to say that I resent being a Mum, I love it, but it’s a blinking juggling act, isn’t it.

On the brighter side, we got out of the house, eventually, and emerced ourselves in our beautiful countryside. It definitely helped.

In conclusion, life can definitely be testing and we shouldn’t put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect all the time. Mistakes are made and I guess that’s when we really learn something about ourselves.

Love to you all, cxxx


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